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> it's actually really easy from the management side of the table to tell when someone is just laying on the flattery and trying to say all the right things to butter people up.

How do you know you didn't just catch the people who are bad at it?



I think most managers are afraid to think how the people who like them are using them. That fear is intensified by past decisions around liking: when you've promoted someone who was good at manipulating you, terrible at the work, and now everyone associates their success with your success.

One reason why good judgement becomes essential the higher up you go. If you just "believe in management", managers below, above and across from you will saddle you with likeable and incompetent people.




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