I would be interested in knowing whether or not one's likelihood to divorce is correlated with whether or not one's parents were divorced. Do you know what the data say?

edit: I found some data. It looks like a couple is twice as likely to divorce if one of them comes from a divorced family, and three times as likely if both do: http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/26714.php

There are some US department of Justice data that shows stuff like 70% of people in prison being from fatherless homes and other things like that.

There was somewhere in about.com a collection of that sort of data.

The more I learn about social data, the more I learn to appreciate traditional values and wisdom.

Don't forget that traditional values and wisdom at one point believed that the ideal child was actually a young gentleman.

Tradition values covered up a huge amount of pain and suffering and created the veneer of predictability.

We've turned over the rock and whats crawling out is what people used to know always happened, but never spoke about.

Considering that life expectancy, quality of life and opportunities for better life are all somewhat better than historically, I for one like the current way of the world. I say this comparing it to what was, not to what it could be. Far too many people (a majority?) have far too little. I've just waved off my grandparents at the airport. My grandfather is the last living of his 14 siblings. 7 made it out of a childhood of abuse, poverty and neglect. Edinburgh in the 1940s sounds like a hell if you were poor. Edit: autocorrect error.

>Having a kid is easier than falling off a log, it just takes time.

Um, you know, that's not always true.

    > Having a kid is easier than falling off a log,
    > it just takes time.

Wrong, and to say so like that demonstrates both ignorance and a significant lack of sensitivity.

Your response was incomprehensible to me until it was explained later down that the point is that sometimes the offending statement isn't true. However, his response was about the unnecessary generalization concerning divorced women and in that context the statement 'having a kid is easy' can be assumed to be true, without changing the point.

You can't insist on people considering all outliers when making a generic point. We'd have to hedge virtually every statement out of fear to offend someone. Therefore I think the severity of your response is uncalled for and suggests you haven't come to terms with the fact that you, or someone near you, is an outlier. It's perfectly fine to educate people about tacit assumptions when those are the relevant point of a discussion, but in the unconstructive way you phrased it, you are not likely to convince anyone.

Tl;dr: I'm not ignorant or insensitive for not considering outliers to a generic statement whose 'mostly true'-ness is the only thing that matters, given ghe context in which it was used.

I think he's correct. Being pregnant and giving birth is tremendously challenging (and rewarding, to many), but is a drop in the bucket compared to the entire rest of your life being about Not You. Not only do you face the constant lack of sleep, but you now have to worry about financial planning, raising the kid to be a good human, etc.

Having a kid is easy. Raising a kid (well) is hard.

Sorry, but you too are showing breath-taking ignorance and considerable lack of sensitivity and tact, even with the clues staring you in the face.

Let me be just a little more blunt - it's not only the case that for some people having children is not easy, but in addition, it's a big deal that they CAN'T HAVE CHILDREN.

Now, have you got the point?

My wife develops kidney stones when she is pregnant. During the second pregnancy, she had to pass them without pain medicine. There are many other conditions that women can develop when pregnant, but that go away after giving birth.

Pregnancies are anything but easy, even though they last a relatively short amount of time. Raising children is hard, but at least some portion of parenting skills come naturally. I don't think the same can be said for enduring months of intense pain/illness.

We looked after my partner's sister's 2 month old (and her 2 year old) last night. From all the stories people have told me I was actually expecting it to be worse than it was. We still got woken up a few times (a couple of times from him 'gurgling' from his cold - hearing a baby gurgle like that, then stop breathing for 10 seconds, is a bit nerve wracking!), and sure I'm tired today, but I think I could manage this :)

(For months on end, hmm, well, only one way to find out!)

Parental Anecdote: The first three months with a newborn are rather horrid. At age six months, get start to become cute and they begin to interact, so it becomes more rewarding. By the first year, they sleep through the night and they're a lot of fun. After age two, kids are no longer a liability. They are tremendous asset to a family - they're fun-loving, curious, joyful, and keep you on your toes.

Those date ranges vary widly from child to child (and from parent to parent.)